When Sex Is Just a Bad Idea

by Stacy Gilliam, for AOL Personals

Samantha Jones might have us believe that hot sex anytime, anywhere and with anyone is acceptable. But let's face it: Her hormones were written in the script. In the real world, sometimes a single gal ought to keep our panties on and step away from potential disaster. Here's when:

1. Because he cheated on you. He's scum. He's the scum beneath the scum. But you're not. Why sink to his bottomless depths and lay down with another guy to get back at him. Will it really make you feel better? Not in the long run.

2. To gain someone's love. The thinking here is, if you give him your goodies, he'll feel all warm and fuzzy about you, and escort you off into the sunset with him forever. Pump the brakes. If there's no guarantee he feels the same as you do before you have sex, there's even less of a guarantee he will after.

3. You're doing it out of pity. Trying to boost some poor sap's self-esteem, eh? Hmm. How about a cupcake and a motivational tape instead? Be a cheerleader for this guy, but don't give him sex as a temporary solution for what's probably a much deeper problem.

4. You dig his car. Really? You'll have sex with someone just to ride in a shiny, new-smelling ride? Let's think about the sense that makes.

5. To get something. Someone once said: "Use what you got, to get what you want." Well, your body shouldn't apply here. Plenty of folks have earned fame, power, even the rent money without doing the deed. Plus, making this a habit kinda puts you in, uh, hooker territory.

6. He bought dinner. And? You owe him a "Thank you," not a night of passion.

7. You're drunk. Unless you're at home inebriated with someone you trust, this is wrong on so many different levels. Don't put yourself in danger and end up doing something you might not remember in the morning. You're best bet: Know your limitations when drinking around strangers.

8. Your friends are doin' it. So you're on a double date and the accompanying couple are gettin' pretty hot and heavy. You've no obligation to follow them down that road. Follow your own path and enjoy your date without taking your clothes off.

9. You crave attention. Trust us, the quick gratification isn't worth it. Even if you're lucky to have a good time, you'll feel even lonelier in the morning. Adopt a puppy instead.

10. To be mean. Your best friend betrayed you, so you sex up the guy she's digging. Pretty low, and pretty dumb. If he bites, best believe he'll be laughing with his buddies about how he bagged two best friends. If he doesn't bite, your ego's a shattered mess. Spare everybody's feelings and find a new gal pal.

Stacy Gilliam is an award-winning freelance journalist living, working and loving in Washington, D.C.

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